Then the manager came to see what was causing all the commotion, and that’s when he found the very-conservative salesman unhappily struggling to right an enthusiastically pointy chicken which was almost as tall as he was. And Laura and I were all “CHICKEN DOWN! CLEAN-UP IN AISLE 3” but he didn’t laugh. So he loaded it onto a trolley, but Beyoncé was surprisingly unstable, and the giant 5 foot metal chicken crashed over onto the floor. All this chicken belongs to us now.” Insert-inappropriate-cock-joke-here. He didn’t know anything about them, but he said that they’d only only sold one and it was to a really drunk lady, and then Laura and I were all “ SOLD. Then we flagged down a salesman, and we were all “What can you tell us about these chickens?”, as if we were in an art gallery, and not in a store that specializes in last years’ bathmats. It’ll be like, “ You thought *yesterday* was bad? Well, now you have a enormous metal chicken to deal with. And when our friends are sad we can leave him at their front door to cheer them up. Me: But on the plus side? It’s not towels. That’s like, $200 worth of chicken for free. Me: The 5-foot tall one was $300, marked down to $100. Me: You’re joking, but they’re kind of horrifically awesome. And that was exactly what I was still echoing through my head an hour later, when Laura and I stopped our shopping carts and stared up in confused, silent awe at a display of enormous metal chickens, made from rusted oil drums. Then Laura came to pick me up so we could go to the discount outlet together, and as Victor gave me a kiss goodbye he lovingly whispered, “ You are not allowed to bring any more goddam towels in this house or I will strangle you“. Then I pointed out that the last towels I’d bought were hot pink beach towels, and he was all “EXACTLY” and then I hit my head against the wall for an hour. I can’t tell you the details because it wasn’t interesting enough to document at the time, but it was basically me telling Victor I needed to buy new bath towels, and Victor insisting that I NOT buy towels because I “ just bought new towels“. And, based on what I saw, I would agree.This morning I had a fight with Victor about towels. FYI-This movie was recently listed by Crack Online on their list of Five Cartoons Way Darker Than Most Horror Movies. However, if all Betty Boop cartoons were this bizarrely entertaining, I'd seek them out-but unfortunately they are not. You just have to see it to understand what I mean. None of it is cute-mostly it looks like a film directed by or inspired by Salvador Dali or a man on LSB (is there a difference?). When he says no, they appear to try to kill him in many weird and funny ways. As I watched "Bimbo's Initiation", I was surprised how good the cartoon was as well as how inappropriate it was for younger audiences! In a strangely surreal film, the Fleischer Studio managed to appeal and repel two different audiences! However, despite the title, Bimbo is a dog-Betty Boop's friend and companion-so the film is NOT adult in this regard! The film begins with Bimbo walking down the street when he's tossed down a manhole by a BRIEF appearance of a character that looks exactly like Mickey Mouse! However, he comes and goes so fast-probably so that they wouldn't get sued for using this Disney character! But, since we are in the age of DVDs and computers, stop and look-it IS Mickey! Bimbo falls down this tunnel into a fun-house like world where he is constantly being asked if he wanted to join some secret society or cult.
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